On a roll...

Been back on meds a little more regular of late, and it seems to be helping... again. As time goes by it becomes a little more clear how meds help and how they don't. It's a tricky thing to try and entangle, the physiological from the psychological. They like to feed off of each other.

If I've learned anything, I've learned to get back on my feet a lot faster. I wonder how this will affect me down the road. I wonder how much my depression will effect me. It will always be a factor, but how much of one? It seems less of one now, or at least less often a factor. The lows aren't as low. I can't stop them from coming but I can lessen them. How much will I be able to lessen them tomorrow, I wonder. At least now I know what I'm dealing with. It's still hard for me to think of all the years I knew something was wrong, but not what, or why... Or how to deal with it. I see in retrospect I was often doing exactly opposite of what I should have. How many of the worlds problems could be solved if we simply knew how?

But for now I'm doing good. Been so much to deal with this year, I feel like a buoy... Down, but never out. Just bobbing along.